World domination?

Well, not exactly.


A day I don’t listen is rare
So today didn’t seem very fair.
Just the luck Limerick has!
While Scott Brick reads White Jazz,
Marco Werman reads me on the air!

Figuring on cruel Clevetown commute this snowy evening. The Savant pops "White Jazz" CD into the mobile music box. Ellroy on a silver platter. To soothe jangled nerves. Typically Mullins and Werman and Bell ride shotgun. Better than a police scanner for taking the pulse of this crazy world.

Not tonight. Tonight it’s Scott "Solid As A" Brick. He’s laying down the staccato rhythms of L.A. dicks and hot chicks. Cool. Gritty. Solid as his name. "Lay it on me, Scottie boy. Lay. It. On."

Suddenly Ellroy's sweet beat is cut short. That familiar cellular buzz. It's Rene. What does she want? "Hello?"

"He's reading you!"

"Wha?'

"Marco. He's reading your limerick! On the radio."

"Shit!"

It's too late. Fingers fumble. Can't switch modes in time. He's gone! "Yeah, I…"

"I'm so excited!" She cuts me off, excited. "I was checking a kiln and I think I hear 'Limerick Savant.' It's Marco Werman on the radio. And then he repeats 'Limerick Savant' and he's reading your limerick! Right there on 'The World!' I couldn't believe it!"

"I sent them an email. I was listening yesterday. You know, the 'Global Hit.' They had on this violinist. Lisa Mullins interviewing this controversial guy. He's like a virtuoso. Plays like Mozart. But he does the cadenzas like 'Turkey in the Straw.' Or Bluegrass. Or Jazz. Whistling. But still Mozart. You know. Still his style. Notes. Gilles Apap. That's his name. So I compose this limerick while I'm driving home. And I send it to them. I do that sometimes. When a story inspires me on NPR I send them the limerick. They never even write back. This time it was PRI. I didn't expect anything. Remember? I sent them that one when they did their April Fools story. The 'exploding maples' story. They totally got me with that one! I thought my limerick was pretty clever. They never answered. But I'm usually listening. Not today. I can't believe it! Of all the times. I think, 'I'll listen to that book from the library.' The James Ellroy. What bitter irony!"

"Well maybe they record it. Can you get it online?"

"That's it! Thanks, doll. Sure. That's where I linked to that Frenchy fiddler story. I'm saved."

"You should write a limerick about THIS."

"Huh?"

"You know. The whole 'missing it' thing."

"Yeah. Sure, babe."

So our savvy Savant is saved. Thanks to miracles of modern tech. He's got the whole story. Downloaded. On mp3. Suitable for play on his iPod. Where he can listen to Marco reciting his limerick over and over. That smooth cool voice. Selected and looped. Deleting the unneeded. A Global Hit. At least in his own mind.

And remember. You heard it here first. Off the record. On the Q.T. And very hush hush.



Beth Rowley PRI's The World
By Marco Werman, The World's Global Hit, 11/21/08
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