Monday, January 29, 2007

Maybe it's the accent

Every time that he comes to the dais
Mr. Bush uses words that dismay us.
I keep hearing his voice
Say his leadership choice
In Iraq is a man named "Betrayus!"

(with thanks to Michael Feldman for the inspiration Oh, let's be honest; I stole his joke.)

The Bush plan and the Petraeus doctrine
By Paul Reynolds, BBC News, 1/11/07

Friday, January 19, 2007

On notice

Since Colbert had them coughing up spittle
We’ve been wondering whose biting wit’ll
Be chosen this year
And, just as we fear,
The Press Corps will settle for Little.

White House press corps to play it safe at bash
-- with Rich Little
Joe Garofoli, The San Francisco Chronicle, 1/17/07

Thursday, January 18, 2007

'Round midnight

This timepiece is used to display
Where the nuclear threat stands today.
Please note its advance
Indicates there's a chance
Armageddon's five minutes away!

Doomsday Clock edges toward midnight
Scientists add global warming to nuclear fears
The Boston Globe, 1/18/07

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Found: the three-l lllama

A message from Royal Nepal Airlines:

Yes, it's true that our planes never flew
Where the llamas do "L" number two.
Now our ad on the wall
Asks "Have you seen Nepal?
We have lost it somewhere in Peru!"

[Apologies to Ogden Nash]

Have you seen Nepal? Not really, Peru says
The Boston Globe, 1/10/07

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Computer woes

My Mac's S.M.A.R.T. drive is smart enough to let me know that is is about to fail but, unfortunately, not smart enough to repair itself. Needless to say, I will be spending what little free time I have in the process of backing up all essential files; schlepping the Mac to the Apple Store for repair/replacement of the drive; counting the minutes until its return; so that I can spend countless hours reinstalling all the little-used software that I have accumulated; in the hopes that it will tide me over until I can afford the new Mac that I so dearly deserve.

In the interim, I will try to post (if inspiration visits) through whatever means I can. Otherwise, you may talk amongst yourselves until I return.

Taking the bulimia by the horns

Mr. Bush is indulging the urge
To seek a solution in "surge."
But more troops in Bagdad
Will not end the jihad
Just as sure as a binge follows purge.

Bush Works To Rally Support for Iraq 'Surge'
By Michael Abramowitz, The Washington Post , 1/9/07

Monday, January 01, 2007

A cup of kindness yet

I've tried since September 11,
With verses and limericks, to leaven
The news, at its worst.
If I may be the first,
Let me say "Happy 2007!"

In the last week we have witnessed the demise of a dictator, the passing of a president, the loss of the godfather of soul and many more souls lost in the Grand Guignol that is Iraq. None requiring comment from the Savant to heighten its poignancy.

During my holiday hiatus I have given some thought to the future of this blog. I have been filling these virtual pages with my detritus for five years now. First, on my website and finally here on this blog. The discovery of blogging was a revelation since it no longer required a major reformat every time I wished to make a post. So, technically it has actually become easier to do what I set out to do.

There certainly has been no shortage of topical nonsense to fuel my nonsense rhymes so I can’t claim a lack of subject matter. There are many more talented limerick writers than I (e.g. see Graham Lester’s wonderful ditty in the comments on my last post). Graham, along with many equally talented folks, has been contributing regularly to the OEDILF (Omnificent English Dictionary In Limerick Form), a remarkable project that I wish I had thought up. My sole contribution so far (on the word "retromingent") has been removed since the dictionary is nowhere near the "Rs" yet.

Yet, I can’t claim to be filling the much-needed niche for political limerick writers, either. As I have discovered along the way, mine was not a unique idea, as I would have liked to believe. Bob Duplantier had already published his book Politickles before I had the notion to self-publish on the Web. And Madeleine "Mad" Kane has been liberally churning out left-wing humor, including limericks, for some time now. I know that I can’t resist taking aim at some of our inflated celebrities, as well, but political figures are more often in my sights.

I have also realized that a blogger is only as good as his/her last post. If you wish to be read, then you need to write. Like the shark that must keep moving to live, a static blog will only sink to the bottom of the ocean of words written every day on the Internet. I have never fooled myself into believing that this venture was more than a self-indulgent pastime. That it has managed to entertain some others, beside myself, greatly pleases me. Though I am not ready to deep six the idea, I may do less to keep it afloat in the year ahead(that certainly beat the nautical metaphor to death didn’t it?). Let's hope less is more.

I have been contemplating a blog in which I can explore the history of my maternal grandfather who died when I was only two. He is my namesake (no, not "Limerick") and I find that I yearn to know more about him and his life. I also hope to use the process as a means for spending more time with my mother who will be my primary source of information. I expect it to be of no interest to anyone but myself and possibly my family but it is what draws me now.

As to the Savant in 2007, who knows? Looking ahead, I can only quote a recently viewed bumper sticker, "Is it 2008 yet?"

U.S. military deaths in Iraq reach 3,000
By Solomon Moore, The Los Angeles Times, 12/31/06