The Candy Date's J-bait!

Roy sez:

Other’s standards, I simply ignore.

After all, what's a teenager for

But to fondle and grope;

Even when she says “nope!”

Like some voters, she really wants Moore.

Stars, Felon, Alabama

Though he’d claimed to be greatly maligned

The stars over Bama aligned

And Governor Bentley

Has, not incidentally,

Accepted his fate and resigned.

BTW, if you are looking for a new drinking game, then try a shot of your favorite spirits every time you hear Bentley invoke a supreme being in this video of last week's denial. A guaranteed buzz before it is over.

Survivor

The cardinals' conclave is nigh and
They'll give it the old college try and
Select a new pontiff.
It's what we all want if
He's not voted off of the island.

Where are you ever going to find reality TV as good as this?

Did a Cross-Dressing Priest Sex Ring Bring Down Benedict XVI?

by Barbie Latza Nadeau Feb 22, 2013,The Daily Beast

The Catholic Church Is Insular and Intolerant

by Robert Shrum Mar 8, 2013, The Daily Beast

The Holy See (no evil)

The Church keeps denying the scope
Of the problem with clergy who grope;
But continued abuse
Only tends to confuse.
Should we call him the Perp or the Pope?

Should There Be an Inquisition for the Pope?
Maureen Dowd, The New York Times, 3/30/10

Who sesso?

Said Prime Minister, S. Berlusconi,
"I'm insulted by all this Bologna
That implies I would pay;
When they line up to play,
Just for pleasure, with my cannelloni!"

Silvio Berlusconi’s age wins him support over alleged affairs
By Rosemary Righter, The Times, 7/22/09

The trail not taken

Advice for Governor Mark Sanford

If you ever expect to avert
Being soiled by adulterous dirt
Then don’t' let 'em catcha,
Not in Appalachia,
But hiking up somebody's skirt.

S.C. Gov. Sanford Admits to an Affair
He Was Visiting Woman in Argentina
By Philip Rucker and Manuel Roig-Franzia
The Washington Post, 6/24/09

Sex and drugs and crude behavior

Republicans- Here’s a cheap thrill:
Think of MMS failing to bill,
Then let out a moan
In your breathiest tone
“Skip the royalties; drill, baby, drill!”

Thanks to Cowtown Pattie for inspiring me to write this one. And as long as we're on the topic of off-shore drilling, here's what Scientific American has to say about its dubious value.

Report Says Oil Agency Ran Amok
Interior Dept. Inquiry Finds Sex, Corruption
By Derek Kravitz and Mary Pat Flaherty
The Washington Post, 9/11/08

Freyed Oprah tears into "Pieces"

Who'd ya think you were fooling, ya dope ya,
By treating the truth as a trope! The
Real price, Mr. Frey,
To be paid for your lie,
Is the fact there's no messing with Oprah.

Now, if she'd only take on Bush!

Live on 'Oprah,' a Memoirist Is Kicked Out of the Book Club
By Edward Wyatt, The New York Times, 1/27/06