Maybe it's the accent

Every time that he comes to the dais
Mr. Bush uses words that dismay us.
I keep hearing his voice
Say his leadership choice
In Iraq is a man named "Betrayus!"

(with thanks to Michael Feldman for the inspiration Oh, let's be honest; I stole his joke.)

The Bush plan and the Petraeus doctrine
By Paul Reynolds, BBC News, 1/11/07

On notice

Since Colbert had them coughing up spittle
We’ve been wondering whose biting wit’ll
Be chosen this year
And, just as we fear,
The Press Corps will settle for Little.


White House press corps to play it safe at bash
-- with Rich Little
Joe Garofoli, The San Francisco Chronicle, 1/17/07

'Round midnight

This timepiece is used to display
Where the nuclear threat stands today.
Please note its advance
Indicates there's a chance
Armageddon's five minutes away!

Doomsday Clock edges toward midnight
Scientists add global warming to nuclear fears
The Boston Globe, 1/18/07

Found: the three-l lllama

A message from Royal Nepal Airlines:

Yes, it's true that our planes never flew
Where the llamas do "L" number two.
Now our ad on the wall
Asks "Have you seen Nepal?
We have lost it somewhere in Peru!"

[Apologies to Ogden Nash]

Have you seen Nepal? Not really, Peru says
The Boston Globe, 1/10/07

Computer woes

My Mac's S.M.A.R.T. drive is smart enough to let me know that is is about to fail but, unfortunately, not smart enough to repair itself. Needless to say, I will be spending what little free time I have in the process of backing up all essential files; schlepping the Mac to the Apple Store for repair/replacement of the drive; counting the minutes until its return; so that I can spend countless hours reinstalling all the little-used software that I have accumulated; in the hopes that it will tide me over until I can afford the new Mac that I so dearly deserve.

In the interim, I will try to post (if inspiration visits) through whatever means I can. Otherwise, you may talk amongst yourselves until I return.

Taking the bulimia by the horns

Mr. Bush is indulging the urge
To seek a solution in "surge."
But more troops in Bagdad
Will not end the jihad
Just as sure as a binge follows purge.

Bush Works To Rally Support for Iraq 'Surge'
By Michael Abramowitz, The Washington Post , 1/9/07